“We think we want sex, but it’s not always about sex. It’s intimacy we want. To touch. Admired. Admired. Smiled at. Smile with someone. Feel secure. Feel like someone’s really got you. That’s what we crave.” ~Anonymous
In many years, I have not had sex. I was meditating one day, and my mind was silent (an extremely rare event), then I heard “Do not have sex until you are married.” Something I heard often growing up as a southern Baptist.
My breathing became rapid and my thoughts began racing. I believe I cried later, if I didn’t cry in that moment. I felt like I had been given clear instructions as to how I should live my life.
Problem was, marriage wasn’t on my list. I do like the idea of monogamy, but I don’t like the idea of being legally bonded to someone for life. Then, if that fails, I will have to go through legal proceedings for my divorce.
I also thought that would mean I would never have sex again, so my mind was all over the place. Fear had taken over. Then, I listened.
First, I realized how subconsciously I was having sex before I was ready.